小谢尔顿
第七季 第3集
绝对不行 Absolutely not.
但我们是在欧洲 现代铁路系统的发源地 But we're in Europe, the birthplace of the modern rail system.
这里也是断头台的诞生地 It is also the birthplace of the guillotine.
那个你就更不准玩了 You're not playing with that, either.
但我是一名大四学生 But I'm a college senior
我比理查德·特拉维斯克更了解火车 and I know more about trains than Richard Trevithick.
谁 Who?
他建造了第一台应用蒸汽机车 He built the first working steam locomotive.
我不在乎 I don't care.
你不能一个人坐火车在欧洲四处游荡 You are not gallivanting around Europe on a train by yourself.
德国孩子经常自己坐火车 German children ride trains by themselves all the time.
当你是个德国孩子之后 我们再聊 When you become a German child, we'll talk.
理查德·特拉维斯克 Richard Trevithick?
他怎么知道这些的 How does he know these things?
乔治给我写了封信 Oh, George wrote me a letter.
亲爱的玛丽 Dear Mary,
希望你和谢尔顿在德国玩得开心 hope you and Sheldon are having a great time in Germany.
太开心了 So great.
前几天拿到了话费账单 Got the phone bill the other day.
贵得吓死人 It was a whopper.
我觉得比起打电话 I figured maybe, instead of calling,
我们应该试试老牌的美国邮政 we should try the good ol' U.S. Mail.
这里一切安好 Everything here is fine.
龙卷风之后有点拥挤 A little crowded since the tornado,
但让我们更加团结 but it's bringing us together.
米西 我还要上大号呢 Missy, I got business to tend to.
我很快就出去 I'll be out in a second.
她好了没 我得洗澡 Is she almost done? I got to shower.
要么排队 要么用院子里的水管 There's a line or a hose out back.
你自己选 Take your pick.
我数三个数 Count of three!
我们的孙女一天天地越来越有趣了 And our granddaughter is getting more fun every day.
你什么毛病 What is wrong with you?
只是在躲猫猫而已 It was just peek-a-boo.
还有件事让你高兴的事 你女儿交了新朋友 You'll be happy to know your daughter made a new friend.
泰勒 Taylor.
他们经常出去 And they've been hanging out a ton.
你为什么打扮得这么漂亮 Where're you going all dressed up?
我没打扮 我要和泰勒去商场 I'm not dressed up, and I'm going to the mall with Taylor.
我什么时候能见见这个女孩 When do I get to meet this girl?
很快吧 该走了 Soon. Gotta go.
大号时间到 Okay, let's do this.
十天后
她回信了 Ooh, she wrote back.
已经开始省钱了 Saving money already.
亲爱的乔治 Dear George,
很高兴收到你的来信 it was really nice to get your letter.
这让我想起你在越南的时候 It reminds me of when you were in Vietnam,
只不过这次是我在异国他乡 except this time, I'm the one in a foreign country
而敌人是谢尔顿 and the enemy is Sheldon.
之前有一天 他想独自一人 The other day, he wanted to go riding around Germany,
乘坐火车游览德国 by himself, on a train.
但我阻止了 But I put a stop to that.
我没听妈妈的话
很好 Good.
你母亲自打失去了房子 Your mom's been going through a rough patch
过得一直不太顺心 但她很坚强 since she lost the house, but she's a strong woman.
看到她直面困难的模样 你一定会骄傲的 You'd be proud of how well she's dealing with it.
你在干什么 What are you doing?
拿你的啤酒 你在干什么 Taking one of your beers. What are you doing?
给玛丽写信 Writing Mary a letter.
小气到打电话都舍不得 Too cheap for a phone call?
你知道话费多贵吗 You know how much those things cost?
花一桶油钱说 "我想你" Tank of gas to say, "I miss you."
而且 来回写信很美好 Besides, this is nice, writing back and forth,
有点像我在军队的时候 kind of like when I was in the Army.
她也给你回信是吗 Oh, she writing you back, too, huh?
怎么了 What?
我的房子被吹走了 My house blows away,
她连个明信片都没寄 I don't even get a damn postcard.
你该先给她写信 我就是这样的 Well, you should write her first. That's what I did.
我又不是她的小气鬼丈夫 Well, I'm not her cheapskate husband.
提醒一句 Heads up,
在你回来前 我可能会把你母亲干掉 I might kill your mother before you get back.
7：39开往法兰克福的班次 7:19 to Frankfurt.
熏肠的发源地 Birthplace of the frankfurter.
那必须去看看 That's a must-see.
谢尔顿 需要我帮你拿什么东西吗 Sheldon, can I get you anything?
不用 No.
- 确定吗 来杯茶 - 不用了 - You sure? Cup of tea? - I'm fine.
- 热巧克力 - 你为什么一直缠着我 - Hot chocolate? - Why are you badgering me?
怎么这么大脾气 Whoa, what brought that on?
没事 一切都好 我只是得学习 Nothing. Everything's fine. I just have to study.
是因为火车的事吗 Is this about the train?
什么 不是 什么火车 What? No. What train?
你还因为我不让你去而生气吗 Are you still mad that I won't let you go alone?
是的 Yes.
听到这个我很遗憾 Well, I'm sorry to hear that.
将来你是个家长了 就会理解我了 Someday, when you're a parent, you'll understand.
当然了 I'm sure I will.
好吧 Okay, then.
亲爱的米西 Dear Missy,
我给你写信 你一定很惊讶吧 I'm sure you're surprised I'm writing to you,
但我有个秘密 必须得说出来 but I have a secret and I have to tell someone
不然脑子就憋炸了 or my head will explode.
之前有一天 我没听妈妈的话 The other day, against Mother's orders,
独自坐了火车 I rode a train by myself.
真是个废柴 What a loser.
因为我爱你 我勇往直前 Because you're mine I walk the line
乔治告诉我 你和谢尔顿 George tells me you and Sheldon
在德国过得很开心 are having a good time in Germany.
这里的一切终于安定下来了 Things here are finally settling down.
我和戴尔住在一起 过得很好 I moved in with Dale, which has been great.
他对我很支持 也很有耐心 He's been so supportive and patient...
你能换一首歌吗 Could you play another song?
我在练习这首歌 I'm working on this song.
你练的是我的耐心 My last nerve is what you're working on.
想弹得好就必须练习 Well, you got to practice if you want to get good.
图什么 你都七十四了 For what? You're 74.
你想在地狱弹这首歌吗 You gonna play that song in hell?
听着 这是我的房子 Look, this is my house,
在我的房子里 我就要弹吉他 and in my house, I play the guitar.
我记得你说过 你的房子就是我的房子 I thought you said your house was my house.
在你的房子里 有个男人弹吉他 And in your house, there's a guy who plays the guitar,
而且他弹得越来越好了 and he's getting pretty doggone good.
《电视指南》来了 Guide's here.
茱莉亚·罗伯茨和莱尔·拉维特 Julia Roberts and Lyle Lovett.
她看上他什么了 What does she see in him?
女人喜欢玩音乐的 Women love musicians.
我得学弹吉他 Man, I got to learn to play guitar.
为什么 Why?
这样你就更爱我了 So your love for me will deepen?
圆得好 罗密欧 Nice save, Romeo.
看啊 妈又来了一封信 Oh, look. Another letter from Mom.
你们两个相互写信好浪漫哦 Aw. I think it's so romantic, you two writing to each other.
因为他是个小气鬼 It's just 'cause he's a cheapskate.
小气也浪漫 It can be both.
我觉得很甜蜜 Well, I think it's sweet.
你想的话我也可以给你写 Well, I can write you a letter if you want.
- 千万别 - 为什么 - Please don't. - Why not?
你的拼写能力让我想哭 'Cause your spelling makes me sad.
我可以用简单词 I can use small words.
亲爱的乔治 我真的很喜欢你的上一封信 Dear George, I really loved your last letter.
谁能想到我可以在德国恋爱 Who would have thought that I would have a love affair in Germany
恋爱对象还是你 and that it would be with you.
我非常思念你们大家 I miss you all so much,
但听起来大家都过得很好 but it sounds like everyone is doing great.
顺便问一句 米西的新朋友泰勒 By the way, Missy's new friend Taylor,
是个男孩还是女孩 is that a boy or a girl?
米西 Missy!
我附上了几张你的孙女的照片 I've included some Polaroids of your granddaughter
还有你的性感美国男孩 and your hot American boy toy.
不要因为对米西的朋友感到困惑而难过 Don't feel bad for being confused about Missy's friend.
他是个男孩 但别担心 He is a boy, but don't worry,
都在我的掌控之中 I'm on top of it.
泰勒是个男孩 Taylor's a boy?
是的 Yes.
所以当你去和他看电影的时候 So when you went to the movies with him,
他是个男孩 he was a boy?
当你在他家游泳的时候 And when you went swimming at his house,
他是个把上衣脱掉的男孩 he was a boy with his shirt off?
我从没说过他是个女孩 I never said he was a girl.
不对 我说过他是个女孩 No, I said he was a girl
你没纠正我 and you didn't correct me.
我不记得谁说了什么 I don't remember who said what.
你记得 你以后不能再见泰勒了 Yes, you do. And that is the last you're seeing of Taylor.
爸爸 和你想的不一样 Dad, it's not what you think.
他对我不是那种喜欢 He doesn't like me like that.
他是个十三岁男孩 He's a 13-year-old boy.
他对所有女孩都是那样的喜欢 He likes all girls like that.
他十五岁 他不是那种喜欢 He's 15, and he doesn't.
十五 Fifteen?
而且他真的不是那种喜欢 And he really doesn't.
那是什么意思 The hell does that mean?
是的 Yeah.
所以 他就是个闺蜜 So, he's like a... gal pal?
对 Bingo.
好吧 Okay.
我可以去他家看电影吗 So, can I go to his house and watch a movie?
没有别的男孩了 No other boys'll be there?
只有他和我 Just him and me.
好吧 All right, then.
谢谢 爸爸 Thanks, Daddy.
时代不同了 玛丽 It's a different world, Mare.
我很骄傲米西这么开明 I'm proud of Missy for keeping an open mind,
而且 我对自己也很骄傲 and, shoot, I'm proud of myself.
顺便说一句 我告诉了爸爸你是同性恋 By the way, I told my dad you're gay.
好的 Okay.
你看见我的吉他了吗 Have you seen my guitar?
没 怎么了 No. Why?
我发誓把它放在房间里了 I could've sworn I left it in the bedroom
现在我找不到它 and now I can't find it anywhere.
真奇怪 That's weird.
你把它藏起来了吗 Did you hide it?
我真不敢相信你这么质疑我 I can't believe you would accuse me of such a thing.
- 你藏了吗 - 我干什么 - Did you? - Did I what?
藏我的吉他 Hide my guitar.
因为我爱你 我要被你逼疯了 Because you're mine I lost my mind
还给我 Well, give it back.
满足我的条件就还给你 Only under certain conditions.
那把吉他在这里的时间比你长多了 That guitar has been here way longer than you have.
你还想见到它吗 You want to see it again?
什么条件 What conditions?
首先 当我出去了 First of all, if I'm out of the house,
你怎么弹都可以 you can play it all day long.
很合理 That's reasonable.
我是个讲理的女人 第二 I'm a reasonable lady. Number two:
你不能弹同一首歌 You cannot play the same song
超过五分钟 for more than five minutes.
不 不 不行 No, no, no, no.
练习就是这样 That's not how practice works.
重复练习才能成为大师 Repetition is the key to mastery.
- 十分钟 - 成交 - Ten minutes. - Deal.
它在壁橱里 雨衣后面 It's in the closet behind the rain coats.
谢谢 Well, thank you.
因为我爱你 Because you're mine
等等 我把计时器拿来 Hold on, let me get my egg timer.
- 再见 - 你去哪 - Auf wiedersehen. - Where you going?
图书馆 Library.
- 在法兰克福 - 玩得开心 - In Frankfurt. - Have fun.
我虽然很讨厌撒谎 As much as I hated lying,
但我更爱火车 I loved trains just a little bit more.
亲爱的曼迪 你有无数让我爱你的优点 Dear Mandy, there are so many things I love about you,
不知从何说起 it's hard to know where to start.
但我还是要说 But I will.
当然 我可以说你多么美... Sure, I could go on and on about your beautiful...
美... B-e...
“美”有几横来着 Where does the dang "U" Go?
好看的大胸 ... pretty... boobs.
但更重要的是 But what's more important
胸里面的东西 你的心灵 is what's underneath: Your heart.
写得太好了 Oh, yeah. That's good.
我能兑现吗 Can I cash out?
当然可以 Oh. Sure.
问个问题 Hey, question...
如果你偷偷溜进浴室看女人洗澡 if you sneak into the bathroom to watch a woman shower,
这算浪漫还是猥琐 is that romantic or creepy?
- 浪漫 - 我也这么觉得 - Romantic. - That's what I thought.
还有你独自沐浴时的曼妙身姿... And when you're alone in the shower...
车票 Ticket?
在这里
我知道这话你肯定听腻了 但你真的是太幸运了
每天 一整天地坐火车 还有钱拿
我老婆跟别的男人跑了
我很抱歉
但好处是 更多坐火车的时间了
怪胎
再见
接方付费电话
美国 德州 梅德福
我的钱都在火车上 我没法回海德堡了
你们能调一辆警车 载我一程吗
该载他吗
你想和他在车里坐一个小时吗
说得对 他确实很烦人
你说你母亲在海德堡 要不我们给她打电话 让她来接你
不行 她以为我在图书馆
你对母亲撒谎
那很不好
我知道
所以 可以载我一程吗
是啊 Ja.
不行 No.
怎么回事 What... What the hell?
- 什么 - 你在干什么 - What? - What are you doing?
我只是给你喷点喷雾 因为你在打鼾 I'm just putting nose spray in 'cause you're snoring.
就算这样也不能把东西插进我的鼻子里 Well, that's no reason to stick something up my nose.
对不起 I'm sorry.
就算有人打鼾的话 也是你 I mean, if anybody snores, it's you.
看看你这大鼻子就知道了 I mean, just look at that honker.
这话不怎么好 That's not very nice.
你侵犯我的鼻子也不怎么好 What's not nice is you violating my nose.
不会再发生了 It's not gonna happen again.
听着 既然你已经醒了 Hey, but listen, now that you're up,
为什么不喷一下另一个鼻孔 why don't we just spritz the other nostril...
你敢 Don't you dare!
好吧 好吧 Okay, okay.
告诉你 你整晚都在放屁 And for your information, you fart all night long.
那是因为你做的饭 It's 'cause of your cooking.
别再喂我墨西哥肉卷了 Quit feeding me fajitas.
亲爱的米西 我已经是第五次乘坐火车 Dear Missy, I'm currently on my fifth train ride
探索德国 exploring Germany
和前奥匈帝国国家了 and the nations of the former Austro-Hungarian Empire.
它经常被称为双重君主制 It's often referred to as a dual monarchy
是因为哈布斯堡统治者 because the Hapsburg ruler
既是奥地利皇帝 was both the emperor of Austria
又是匈牙利国王 and the king of Hungary.
说起饥饿...果馅饼 Speaking of hungry... strudel.
等等 Wait! Wait!
等等 等等 Warten! Warten!
那是德语的"等等" That's German for "Wait"!
正如你所看到的 他们没有等 As you can see, they did not warten.
谢尔顿·库珀 Sheldon Cooper.
喂 Hello?
我有一通谢尔顿·库珀的付费电话 I have a collect call from Sheldon Cooper.
你接受收费吗 Do you accept the charges?
抱歉 我爸说话费太贵了... Sorry, my dad said it's too expensive and...
米西 拜托 是紧急情况 Missy, please, it's an emergency!
好吧 我接受 Fine. I accept.
说吧 Go ahead.
干嘛 What?
我被困在德国魏茵海姆的一个火车站 I'm stranded in a train station in Weinheim, Germany,
无法给妈妈打电话 and I can't call Mom
- 因为我撒谎了... - 抱歉 - because I lied about... - Sorry.
- 我要接个电话 - 等等 别... - I'm getting another call. - Wait, don't...
喂 Hello?
你好啊 泰勒 Oh, hi, Taylor.
没事做 你在干什么呢 Nothing. What're you up to?
米西 Missy!
米西 Missy?
米西 Missy...
不只是因为你洗澡时脱光光 ... and not just 'cause you're naked in the shower...
而是你光光的身体上有香香的泡沫 'cause you're naked and all sudsy.
就像看音乐台 但场景是浴室 It's like watching MTV, but in the bathroom.
我希望这听起来不会显得太猥琐 Well, I hope that didn't sound creepy,
但你太漂亮了 我忍不住要看你 but you're so pretty I can't stop looking at you,
即使衣服上沾满了思思吐的奶 even with clothes on covered with CeeCee's spit-up.
你在读我的信 Oh, you're reading my letter.
我一会再来 I'll come back.
我洗澡的时候你怎么没这觉悟 Oh, now you want to give me privacy?
所以确实有点猥琐 是吗 So, it was creepy, huh?
是的 It was.
你去哪儿 Where you going?
我去洗个澡 Well, I'm gonna go take a shower.
也许我会不锁门 Maybe I'll leave the door unlocked.
好的 Well, all right.
没关系 年轻人 我们会说英语 It's okay, young man, we speak English.
但没我的德语说得好 所以跟上我的思路 But not as well as my German, so stay with me.
海德堡 18公里
- 天哪 - 爸爸 出去 - Oh, God! - Dad, get out!
你为什么不锁门 Why didn't you lock the door?
我怕锁门的功夫耽误事儿 I didn't want to miss anything.
我一直坐在这里看你的照片 ... I've been sitting here staring at your picture,
想着我们在一起的这些年 thinking about all the years we've been together
想着过去几年我是如何 and how I may have taken you
把你的付出当成了理所当然 for granted the last few.
我真的很感激你 我爱你 I do appreciate you, I do love you,
很抱歉我说得不够 and I'm sorry I don't say it enough...
或者根本没说 or say it at all.
好好休息 因为等我回来了 So... rest up because when I get back,
我会向你展示我有多么... I'm gonna show you how mu...
- 喂 - 妈 是我 - Hello? - Mom, it's me.
我知道我不该打电话 I know I'm not supposed to call,
但谢尔顿打来说他遇到麻烦了 but Sheldon called and said he's in trouble.
谢尔顿在图书馆 Sheldon's at the library.
不 他不在 他被困在德国某个火车站 No, he's not. He's stuck at a train station somewhere in Germany.
他什么时候打的电话 When did he call?
我不知道 两三个小时前吧... I don't know. Two, three hours ago...
什么 What?!
你知道的 话费很贵 我挂了 You know, this is expensive, I should go.
我要杀了他 I'm gonna kill him.
你在干什么 What are you doing?
我要去另一个房间睡觉 I'm gonna go sleep in the other room
这样我们就不用烦对方了 so we don't bug each other.
把我一个人丢在这里 And leave me here all alone?
我以为这样的话你会开心 I thought you'd be happy.
我的鼻子会开心 Well, my nose might be happy,
我的其他部分不会 but the rest of me won't be.
除非你离开是因为我的鼾声太大了 Unless you're leaving because my snoring is so bad.
你所谓的打鼾 Alleged snoring.
我所谓的打鼾 Alleged snoring?
我这只耳朵都快聋了 I'm going half deaf in this ear
就因为所谓的打鼾 from your alleged snoring.
一定会有一个折中的办法 Well, there must be a way to compromise.
折中 这件事没办法折中 Compromise? There's no compromise.
你不让我给你喷鼻水 You won't let me spritz your nasal passages.
就算我让你喷 Even if I did,
也阻止不了催泪瓦斯从你裤子里往外崩 that's not gonna stop the tear gas coming out of your pants.
吃进洋葱 排出洋葱 Onions in, onions out...
我们聊过这个了 We talked about this, you know.
天哪 Oh, dear.
喂 警察吗 Uh, hello? Police?
说英语吗 Sprechen English?
很好 很好 Good, good. Um...
我的宝贝儿子在火车站迷路了 My little boy is lost at a train station.
我不知道是哪个车站... No, I don't know which one...
他1米78左右... He's, uh, five foot ten...
对我来说他就是个小宝贝 Well, he's little to me!
没事了 Never mind.
你怎么了 What happened to you?
今天挺不顺的 Tough day.
在图书馆 At the library?
是的 Yes.
你的另一只鞋呢 Where's your other shoe?
当我离开图书馆的时候 When I was leaving... the library,
一只野狗袭击了我 a wild dog attacked me.
亲爱的 不会吧 Oh, sweetie, no.
我把它赶走了 代价是一只鞋 I fought him off, but at the price of a loafer.
你的书包呢 Where's your backpack?
可能也被狗叼走了 I guess he got that, too.
听上去倒也说得通 谢尔顿 Well... that all makes sense, Sheldon,
如果那确实是真相的话 if that's what really happened.
确实是真相 It is.
好吧 Okay, then.
你去躺下休息吧 Why don't you go lie down?
好的 今天发生的事累坏我了 I will. I'm tired from all the things that happened...
- 在图书馆 - 在图书馆 - At the library. - At the library.
我没有惩罚他 Instead of punishing him,
而是让他以为自己逃脱了惩罚 I'm letting him think he got away with it.
愧疚感让他生不如死 The guilt is eating him alive.
真希望你能和我一起享受这一切 I wish you were here to enjoy it with me.
泰勒可以和我 Is it okay if Taylor and
在房间里玩 听音乐吗 I hang out in my room and listen to music?
当然 Sure.
记得把门关上 这样我就听不到了 Just keep the door closed so I don't have to hear it.
没问题 You got it.
估计是同性恋爱听的舞台剧音乐 Probably gonna listen to show tunes.